one tired baby

I had planned on writing about all his new endeavors this morning - first steps and new words - but baby woke up needy, weepy and sleepy. makes for a sleepy mommy too. I'd rather take a nap.

Room with a view

As much as we love our new place, we do not have a "view", from any window really. In the back it's a dumpster, from the bedrooms its an alley (where we can watch our car get blocked in all day), the dining room is the brick of the building next door (although if you open the window you can hear some really interesting conversations going on the restaurant patio below).

Yesterday I was struck by our new view, if only for a moment. I was reminded of how the Lord makes all things new. Nothing escapes His glory - the dirty, the mundane, the insignificant, the ugly.......all things will be made new. It brought much hope to my day, and I pray He will show me this again on the days I can only see what is right in front of me and not the underneath, the behind, the reason, the grand scheme...... His glory.

I partied like it was my birthday

Mornings here so far have been dreamy. Charlie is still somewhat on Central time, so he sleeps until 8-8:30. Not to say B and I don't wake before then. This new city life comes with a built in alarm clock - the hustle and bustle of cars and people, the bus making its stops in front of our place every 30 minutes, the garbage truck that visits the alley right next to our bedroom window twice a week, the delivery trucks backing into the alley (beep......beep.......beep....)......

But back to the dreamy part. After we all eat breakfast we take a little walk down the block to Bryan's car (or sometimes the bus, just paint the man green) to say good-bye. Charlie and I then run (or walk) our errands. The Italian market for meat and cheese, the produce stand, the dry cleaners, the post office, Trader Joe's, the library......all while saying hello to the other moms and their babies, petting the dogs being walked, and watching (trying not to stare) and listening to all the diverse people around us. We make it back to the apartment just in time for Charlie's nap.

Yesterday, just because it was my birthday, I treated myself to tea at the local coffee shop. It would have been coffee if I didn't have a huge aversion for it, and there would have been something sweet involved if it weren't for the lack of desire for that as well (with Charlie I loved all things sweet., with this one I just want a hot meal every 2 hours. hmm.). Bryan then called to say he was treating me to lunch and dinner (the sweet man is very in tune with the fact that I know no one here yet, and that the way to my heart is through good food).

We went to the deli down the street for lunch and realized that the typical deli here is not what we are used to in the South. They are not geared for women meeting their girlfriends, but for business people running in for a quick sandwich. The decor usually consists of red socks paraphernalia turned upside down, and maybe newspaper clippings on the wall. The menu is as straightforward as the people behind the counter, and don't ask for sweet tea. Not to say the people aren't friendly though. The owner sat with us at our table and was as hospitable as any southerner I know - if you could get past her strong Bronx accent.

On the walk home Bryan bought me flowers, and we met Brando, the extremely over sized (fat) Lab that comes to work with its owner everyday, and decided to adopt him as our pet because he and Charlie loved each other so much.

After afternoon naps I decided I had been craving Thai long enough, and that is what I just had to have. I think I love Thai food so much because I can have sweet, sour, savory and spicy all in one bite. Party in my mouth! I was so happy that the place we went to had an authentic Northwestern Thai dish that I had almost every day while in Thailand (nearly 10 years ago) - papaya salad. Other places I have been to attempt something similar with cabbage, but it's not the same.

After a nice little walk in the cool NY night breeze we headed home.

A long post for just the happenings of a day, but it was my day, done just right, and I'd like to remember it that way. Thanks B.
And thanks to all of you who called, emailed, chatted and facebooked!

happy belated day, Pop

I can't say I suffered much during Bryan's travels. I had many babysitters at hand. Pop was one of Charlie's favorites. "Pop" was even one of his firsts words. Little does he know he is his namesake. And I like that.

uncelebrated but appreciated

Although yesterday was Father's Day, the only celebration was getting to have our first "normal" morning as a family in our new home. Normal as it may have been, those couple of hours were heaven.



All the preparation and anticipation of our move really made me think about "leaving and cleaving". I remember standing at the alter nearly 4 years ago, being so filled with joy and butterflies I couldn't say the words fast enough......I promise......love honor and cherish......obey......in sickness and in health......'til death do us part.......

I meant every utter. Towards the end of our walk back down the aisle as husband and wife we ran. Ran out the door. Ran towards the life together that awaited us.

Since then there has been times where my running comes to a pause. Not out of question, but of more full realization. You mean we aren't staying here in my cozy hometown in an owned home near my family and my closest friends? You mean I'm to truly GO where you go? You mean marriage isn't a simple skip, hop, and jump to bliss? I am thankful for the pause, because the answer has resonated so deeply in my heart.

YES! I'll go.

And joyfully. I am so thankful for the struggle it has been to say good-bye. It has made me realize that my husband is enough. He is my best friend, the one I want to be with all the time, always. You're still my favorite.

And, our son's favorite. I walk in the door and Charlie smiles. Bryan walks in the door and Charlie squeals, claps, and races to him. I know every child squeals when their Daddy comes home, but those squeals truly speak of what a loving, attentive, fun father he is.


I am humbled by his heart. his selflessness. his labor. his love.

Happy belated, uncelebrated, Father's Day.

a bit of news, a bit behind

Usually when I don't post in a while it means so much has gone on that I don't know where to start in writing about it. So here is the jist to get me started on the details.

I'm pregnant! thrilled. super tired. often sick. prematurally pooching at 10 weeks. due January 3.

We moved! sooner than we planned. love our new place. plenty of space, in the middle of a fabulous town. you should visit.

Mom

I have often heard others say that becoming a mom makes them more appreciative of their own mother. I can say the same.

Now that Charlie is one, I am no longer the new mom toting around her bundle of joy. I am a parent. I am responsible for those scary things like training, disciplining, rearing......and I think, Mom, how did you do it?

Thank you for letting "Gina-go" become Mom joyfully, wholeheartedly. You not only provided food on the table and clothes to wear, but a refuge to come home to. Thank you for persevering through my Junior High years, and beyond (I guess you are still persevering, huh?). Thank you for letting me become me - trusting that the Lord holds me tight.

My other sweet Mom reminded me of a book I read in college, Stepping Heavenward, and this quote made me think of how you must have thought of us:

Here is a little mouth to kiss;

here are two more feet to make music with their pattering about my nursery.

Here is a soul to train for God, and the body in which it dwells is worth all it will cost,

since it is abode of a kingly tenant.

I may see less of friends, but I have gained one dearer than them all.

Yes, my precious baby, you are welcome to your mothers heart,

welcome to her time, her strength, her health, to her most tender cares, to her life-long prayers! Oh how rich I am, how truly, how wondrously blessed!"

Thank you for thinking not of what your children would take away, but what they would add to each day. What you have brought and continue to bring to this life is priceless.

Thank you. This day, and everyday.

more birthday

the whole day here.

One

As it's been said many times before, the days may be long, but the years are short.

Happy, happy birthday Charlie!

(yesterday)

Better a happy baby

Confession: Before I had a child, I thought your car was really dirty. stinky. quite neglected. Week old fast food bits, half-full juice boxes, toys to wade through at every angle.......I vowed to never let my mini-van get that way.

Yes, I am now eating those words, or thoughts rather (I never told you, I probably said something like "oh...you should see my car, and I don't even have kids! But I was just talking about my dust, and a cup or two). I was thinking about vacuuming my car the other day, and decided pictures were more fun. It's not so shameful if you tell the world you are aware, is it?

There is an upside to having piles of Cheerios everywhere, all the time. Charlie is quite content with his stale, sun-baked snacks. I now say better a happy baby than a clean car.

Forgive me for thinking your car was gross. I now understand, and I openly join the club.

Eleven

His vocabulary has become quite extensive - Ma-Ma, Da-Da, bye-bye, and even light, baby, cheerios, yogurt, cheese, banana, outside, bath, milk, bunny, paci, and ball to name just a few.

We know what you mean, even if they are all pronounced "ba".

His favorite places to be are outside or in the bathtub, and his favorite person is his Dad.

He loves to dance, sing, drum (on everything), and even play air-guitar.

You bring indescribable joy to our everyday!

There is still no tooth in sight, and because he can crawl nearly faster than I can run he has no interest in walking.

That's ok, take all the time you need. You already make it from the living room to the toilet in 5 seconds flat, and I am usually 3 seconds behind - just enough time for you to get a couple of good splashes in.

The days are often long, but the year has been short. How can it be that my baby is already one less than one?!

Groovin', on a Sunday afternoon

I, obviously, take lots of pictures of Charlie just doing his thing. So I thought the other man in my life needed to be captured just doing his thing. At least, his thing for this Sunday afternoon (the song was playing in the car today and I can't get it out of my head!).
He will love it.

Excitement for the day

This is what happens when you trust your 11 month old to entertain himself while you are on the phone anxiously trying to get the last spot for a photography conference. A friend of Bryan's told him about it only today, and since it was free, and my babysitters, I mean parents, are on the way.....well, I had to try! I'm in! I'm pretty certain I will be quite out of place, but I'm excited nonetheless.

First boo-boo

The culprit: the Conner's coffee table

Enjoying his second favorite place to be, the doorway. His first is on the other side, outside. The first thing he did this morning was point to the door and grunt until we obliged.

Spring has sprung

Although, as I am writing it is 49 degrees outside.

I think I like Spring in Alabama because it is like me, indecisive and fickle. But Summer is not, and I know it will come barreling in just as I'm getting comfortable with the spring in my step and the fresh in the air.

So, for today....er, eh, tomorrow? I hope to savor it for what it is.








While we were away for a week a bird decided to make our home her own. This is what we found in the vine on our front porch!

Dee-lux apartment in the sky-ii

In October of 2006, we finally got our piece of the pie. We planned on enjoying it for at least 5 years.

Since Bryan is already employed with Worktopia but will not move there until June, he "gets" to travel to NY every few weeks. Last week we both went so that we could hopefully find housing for us when we move. We knew it would be a feat, only having a short amount of time, and not wanting to move (or pay) until at least May, hopefully June (rentals are listed and then gone within days).

To say the trip did not go as planned would be an understatement. I got food poisoning right off the plane (beware of Burger King in the LaGuardia airport!) and spent the next few days in bed. I am so thankful for my mom making the trip, and spending it with Charlie and 4 walls. The hardest part of being sick for me was not the obvious, but that I didn't get to have fun with her. When I was finally able to step foot out of the hotel, we attempted to check out the local towns, but ended up lost and in a crummy deli. We had some awkward conversations with locals, and our own conversation was nil because all my effort was spent fighting back tears. I was trying so hard (too hard) to picture what life would be like when we moved, and the picture wasn't pretty. Don't start feeling sorry for me, the story gets better.

Finally, the clouds began to clear (literally too) on Thursday and I spent 2 days with Bryan's boss's wife, who is a real estate agent, looking for housing. I'm not sure if having a baby or trying to find housing in 2 days is more exhausting. Every place had it's quirks, from the price, to laundry being outside, space, location....you name it. I was content with a couple of places and didn't even want to see the last place, but to appease Bryan, I did. And loved it.

Maybe I was delirious at this point for choosing an apartment above a restraunt, but after weighing all that we saw we are thrilled that we get to live here. I had prayed weeks before we came that the Lord would let us find an affordable (ok, this term is completely relative, and laughable), functional 3 BR. As we were looking I began to think that my expectations had been too high, so this place was such a suprising answer to prayer.
So, you have an open invitation to visit any time, and you have your own room!

Cozying up to change

As of 2 weeks ago, my husband is no longer an employee of Infomedia. There aren't enough words to express my thankfulness to his boss and co-workers for taking him under their wings at the green age of 18, paying his way through school, and instilling much more than work ethic and business sense. Bryan's best friends are there. I love that those are the people he still wants to hang around when business hours are over.

The decision to leave the company was made after much thought, conversation and prayer over the course of a year. The only way we could make the change was if we were confident in the next step. Little did we know that step would be 1000 miles NE.

We had talked before about what a dream it would be for Bryan to work for Worktopia, but the thought was that we could stay in Birmingham, even though they are located in NY. I'll never forget the brief conversation we had while Bryan was there for a few days to work on a project. I was in our cozy little home, snuggled on my couch, Ben and Jerry's in hand, enjoying my little I'm all alone party when Bryan called. I was excited to finally hear from him about how his time was going. Our conversation went something like this:

Bryan: "Hey babe........yeah, looks like I could have a job here...."

Me: "That's fabulous!"

Bryan: "Yeah, and I'm thinking it may be hard to stay in Birmingham. You know, you may really like it here."

click.

dial tone.

No, I didn't hang up on him, we lost service. The next 30 minutes are somewhat blurred in my memory, but I think I recall some tears, and melted ice cream.

Friends that know me know that I love adventure and change. Yet friends who really know me know that I am also fearful of it and would just prefer my life to be comfortable. predictable.

The Lord has been gracious to continually show me that though my circumstances may not always be cozy, He is my comfort; that life may be about change, but He is my constant. He also gave me the most steady and calm man on earth (really) as my husband. Yesterday he recognized my deer in headlights mood and suggested we do something other than the usual TV and computers, which only feed the numbness.



It was quite cozy.

Out with the old......

I bought this dress when I was in college. I loved it's classic look, and wore it a lot.

It has been years since I have worn it, but it is still hanging in my closet. Why? Because one day I might like to wear it again.

As I was cleaning out and reorganizing my closet yesterday I saw it and nearly put it in the "keep" pile yet again. In my mind it is fresh and romantic, beckoning a barefoot walk on the beach. In reality, I am a 5 foot frump in it, and how often am I on a beach?!

This blog has been like that dress. I just know it's here, and one day I may actually write about the things I think about.

Today was momentous. I actually loaded the dress up (along with the too big and too small things that I think I may one day fit in again, the long jean skirt that may make a comeback some day, and the expensive formal dress that I've been meaning to put on ebay for a year now) and took it to a consignment store.

And so, in occasion with out with the old, in with the new..... a simple post, hopefully the one that will break the ice, or silence rather.

So much is going on in my life that I almost feel numb to it all. Words are saved for my journal (I still favor pen and ink) and two-way conversations with friends. Life is a whirlwind of preparing for a move to NY, selling our house, grieving the loss of my dear grandfather, and still trying to play mom, wife, and friend.

But silence never does me much good.

Stay tuned.

St. Patty's and Peas

He decided that it was much more fun to smoosh peas than to eat them.

Ten

Ten has snuck up on me.

I thought he was busy before, and yet each day I sweat a little harder chasing him. Everywhere. Bryan and I often wonder what would happen if we just let him go. So sometimes we do.

Although our lives have been somewhat turned upside down recently, he has been our constant joy.

His babbling actually seems purposeful these days - we think "da da", "eye", and "igh" (light) may actually mean something.

Tantrums are becoming more frequent, although still laughable.

He loves to point, at everything. Tonight it was the moon.

I still remember singing "I see the moon, the moon sees me, God bless the moon, and God bless me...." with my parents when I was little.

Sweet memories.

It is amazing (and yet scary!) to think that we are raising a child, and the things we do and say may actually be remembered one day!