Sleep

I miss it.

It has now been almost 10 weeks since I have had more than 2 1/2 hours of sleep at a time. This morning Bryan took the babe while I took a nap and I actually dreamed about......sleep.

Charlie doesn't take all the blame though. He has had a few 9-3 stretches, but B and I find it hard to jump in bed as soon as he goes down. We finally have a little time to ourselves. Case in point, it is after 11 pm and I am writing about sleep rather than enjoying it!

Drool Monster

He has many nicknames, but this is the latest.

An outdoor nap

Two things that Charlie loves. Sleep and the outdoors. And Mom loves a happy Charlie.

Overwhelmed

Whew. I now know what others have meant when they have said that the first few weeks of parenthood is spent in survival mode. Of all the books I have read and moms I have been around, nothing fully prepared me for this new phase of life. My world, as well as my heart, has been turned inside out. I thought I knew exhaustion. I thought I knew responsibility. I thought i knew love......

After all the countless nights that I thought I couldn't even sit up to feed Charlie again, after the many hours that I have bounced, rocked, and tried my best to console an unconsolable child, after crying tears of helplessness of my own, nothing could make me love my little one an ounce less. And to think that Christ sees me this same way? Even during the first few weeks as Charlie was clueless that Bryan and I even existed, I couldn't get enough of him. I didn't care that he didn't respond to any of my hugs and kisses. He still made my heart melt. And now as he looks at me and gives me that flirty smile of his......I don't have the words! Is this how Christ feels when we turn our gaze to Him?

B and I could sit and stare at our little guy for days and marvel at his newest "feats" - things that anyone other than a parent would think so small. Bryan called me in his room yesterday to show me how C had rolled over for the first time. Does the Lord get this excited about my own little feats? The things that myself or others see as a drop in the ocean?

Through all the work and stripping of self that being a parent has brought, I am most overwhelmed with this new found love. Love for my son, love for my husband now as a father, and love for the Lord who has so graciously loved me. I can't help it. And to think, He can't help it either?

Time flies

Happy one month little guy.

Trip to the Beach

We were not sure if we had gone crazy, or if we were in desperate need of a change of atmosphere when we decided to pack up and head to the beach last week. Maybe it was a little of both, but it was wonderful. Our routine did not change (feeding, diapering, catching an hour or two of sleep, repeating) but it was nice nonetheless. We only saw the beach a couple of times after dinner, but we lived on the balcony. Charlie seemed to love the warm breeze and sound of the ocean. Thanks to my parents and brother and sis in law for letting us use their place!

One Week

He left the hospital at 5 lbs., 9 oz but only 4 days later he was up to 6.1. He has a ferocious appetite!


He did not get these legs from me!



He has his daddy's feet.

The Arrival of Charlie

After a weekend of intense contractions and just feeling "different", I went to the doctor on Monday, April 30, expecting to hear that I would have the baby within the week. She told me "Congratulations, you are 1 cm. Are you interested in coming back at the end of the week to possibly schedule an induction for next week?". I was suprised to hear that, still being 2 weeks away from my due date (May 12). So obviously I left with no hopes of having the baby early. I wasn't dissappointed, I just planned on another week of nesting.

I called Bryan to let him know that our plans for the Norah Jones concert that night were still on. We laughed later about how if Charlie did come that night we would have to give Norah some credit. Thanks Norah.

Evidently Bryan wasn't sleepy when we got home, so he decided to pop a sleeping pill. We thought about Father of the Bride II and laughed at the picture of Bryan loopy and unmanageable in the hospital. We finally settled in bed and both let out a big sigh of relief to be there. It was only minutes later that I feel the balloon burst. I jump up and out of the bed and yell that my water broke. Bryan lay wide-eyed in disbelief, then we both ran around like chickens with their heads cut off. I was shaking with fear, and trying to process all the thoughts rushing through my head. The contractions began immediately, about 5 min. apart.

We arrived at the hospital around 1:30 am and I began the process with much anxiety, and pain. I think it was the grace of God that made Bryan pop the sleeping pills b/c I really didn't want to talk or be touched at all, and he was able to actually sleep a little. I was at 4 cm and able to get the epidural at around 4 am, but it took the anesthesiologist a while to get there. During this time Bryan leaned over to pray for us to which I responded, "pray silently". By the time the anesthesiologist arrived my contractions were on top of each other and I was nearly 8 cm. Bryan says he thought I might pull the arm off the bed. I had 2 contractions during the epidural - thankfully - b/c all fear I had of it disappeared (other than the fear of being paralyzed from flinching from the pain of the contraction). Once it set in, the epidural was the closest thing to heaven I have experienced. I was all of a sudden a different person, able to enjoy this time with Bryan and my nurse.

Charlie arrived at 11:03 am, May 1 at 5 lbs., 15 oz., 20 1/4 inches. We had a little scare as he didn't cry for the first minute or so. Maybe he's just a laid back little soul. The rest of the day was quite surreal. I just couldn't put my head around this little guy being ours. But it was beautiful.

The rest of our stay in the hospital is a blur. No sleep for 48 hours, literally. I loved my nurses, but I wish they didn't come in the room (seemingly) every 30 minutes.

We are now happy to be home, and actually loving this little slice of life. Welcome Charles Bryan Davis! We are overwhelmed with love for you!

Showers

My friends the Hall's (the family I used to babysit for) opened up their beautiful home for my first baby shower given by both old and new friends. A couple of my favorite gifts were a handmade newborn outfit from April, and baby gap overalls given by Jane as a "membership" into their family (when her kids were little they would all travel in the same overalls so that she could keep up with them).


We have been so thankful for our new friends from our church, Red Mountain. Our community group suprised us with a little shower a couple of weeks ago. They all shared both funny and encouraging stories of parenting and gathered around us and prayed for our new family. We have been amazed by how quickly the Lord has provided such true friendship in the short amount of time we have been here.

All of "the girls" (as we are affectionately called when we - about 30 of us- get together) threw me a shower at Anna's new beautiful home. I not only received cute things for Charlie, but also a pedicure, plants for my house, and a workday in my yard from Liz, Merle, and Master Gardner Jane! Pictures to come.

36

I'm currently 37 weeks, but the pic was taken at 36.
The other day we were laughing with friends about the differences in having the first vs. the second child. They are expecting their second around the same time we are expecting our first. The husband said the difference is this: "so Bryan, how many weeks is Angie?" He replied, "36". To which, the husband relplies, "yeah, I have no clue how many weeks my wife is".

31!

We've been intending to take weekly pictures to track the progress of my growing stomach, but it has turned out to be about monthly. Yesterday I asked Bryan to track week 31, in the most flattering way he could manage......but I think he enjoyed taking advantage of this opportunity. Next time I'll wear black.

From Fear to Freedom

I've been greatly impacted by the book I have been reading by Rose Marie Miller, From Fear to Freedom, and have been wanting to record some thoughts about it for some time. It is very much a book for the single, the married, the parent, the child, and for me - the often guilt ridden and condemed, the bearer of bitterness towards others whether conscious or not.

It is basically the honest and vulnerable story of her personal journey, mainly involving her family. In her words I see how conditional my own love and forgiveness is, how narrow my view of the gospel is, how I crave comfort and control, how weakly I view prayer (especially questioning God's willingness & power to transform the most difficult issues).......I could go on.

One quote I took away from her this morning is, "prayer is partnership with God coming to expression in words". Partnership in my prayer?! You mean it's not begging and pleading an untouchable God to intervene on my behalf? Is this at least part of what it means to be "in Christ"? To be a son, rather than a slave?

I'll keep reading.

Rewind

Our friend Brian Prentiss came into town last week to have a guy fest at the lake with Bryan and some other guys. As we were talking with him and Nicholas and Oliver on the way back from the airport I realized how much I missed that family. So what else can you do but hop on a plane and head to California the next day?

As the guys were passing gas and beating their chests over burgers and brews, Katie, Abi and I had a great time having our own "pink" fest as Abi might have called it (in her little dreamy princess mind, anything that has any worth in this world is PINK). If it were another time in our lives we might have enjoyed getting out and doing more than hanging out over rented movies and good books, but we were quite the pregnant pair: she with painful Braxton Hicks (only 39 days to go!), and I with a touchy sciatic nerve (still 86 left). Oh, and let me not forget Abi, who constantly reminded us of the baby in her tummy too (prayerfully, at least 20 years to go).

Bryan flew out and joined me in time to go to Grace and see the progress that has been made in the short 4 months that we have been gone. We were so welcomed and encouraged. We had lunch with some dear friends at one of our favorite Chinese spots, checked out the new shops on Castro, stopped by Red Rock for old times sake (sorry I missed you Emily, Diane, Angela, Michelle....), and had fabulous desserts at the new Mediterranean coffee/sweets/food/wine hang out, Netto.

We loved reminiscing about the brief but rich chapter of our lives that was spent there. We ended our time with a stimulating and thought provoking conversation with Brian and Katie. Just like old times.

There are many places we could have spent our airline miles on, but little Mountain View CA has more than a vacation could ever offer.

Poochin' Proof

Week 25.

I'm currently at 26 - only 14 to go! My doctor as she was measuring me on Friday said, "wow, (shaking head) this baby is really growing"! She says that after the scale told me I gained 4 lbs. in only 2 weeks! Did I really just put that out there for all of cyberspace to know?

Although the scale confirmed it, I previously had no doubts. Our "little" one has been pushing on my ribs for 2 weeks now. He obviously prefers my right side - I often have a slight, to the right, lopsidedness to my stomach. I can't sleep on my right side due to the pressure he puts on whatever organs are there, and my right leg will frequently go numb. Are we sure this kid only weighs 2 lbs.? I'm sure though this uncomfortable feeling is mutal - there is just not much room in my short torso for both of us! Poor kid.

I am growing more and more excited each day about meeting Charlie. It's amazing to think that this little child still in the womb is already known by God, created intricately with his own personality, talents and gifts. Of course I often wonder what he will look like, but even more so, who will he be? What will he be interested in? What will excite him? How will the Lord use him?

As I feel him move around I think about how even though it is happening inside me, I have no control over his little kicks and squirms. Although he is utterly dependent on me, he is also completely independent of me. As much as I want to think he is simply my little baby, he is even more so a child of God. How can we be so blessed?!

The Bungee Belt

I have found that maternity clothes are never, ever as cute on as they are on the rack. As soon as I put on the typical empire-waist shirt with a tie in the back, I don't feel like a pregnant woman but like a little girl with a belly. I know I basically have to get over this and just wear what fits, but it's hard to throw all of my personal style out the window just because I'm getting fat. Don't get me wrong. I am fully aware that I am no fashion diva, but I just want to still feel like "me".

So to all current or soon-to-be friends with child, let me introduce you to my favorite maternity invention - the Bella Band (or as my brother-in-law has named it, the bungee belt). I am amazingly still able to wear my normal jeans because this little contraption allows me to wear them unbuttoned (even unzipped when I've gone a little overboard on the ice cream) while securely keeping them in place. And thanks to the current trend of layering tops, it's not too obvious (although my shirt usually comes down lower than what is shown in the pic). Well, until now. I guess my secret is out.

Humility is good

What's more embarrassing than fainting in Walmart? Reliving it in the second row during a church service.

My only thoughts as I was going down (thankfully, just slumping over onto my husband's shoulder) were "Lord, please....don't....let.... the pastor....ask "is there a....doctor....in the house". At least it was a prayer.

By the grace of God the pastor didn't notice, and my husband heroically ran out and returned with crackers and cheese in seconds.

Poochin'

I think I am beginning to get out of the stage of pregnancy that my friends like to call the "is she, isn't she?" stage, and into the "the belly is always the first topic of conversation" stage. It has mostly been pretty weird for me to have my stomach constantly in the spotlight, always being evaluated; but at times it is really fun.

Today I was in Lowe's buying paint and the cashier says, "you paintin' the baby's room?". I laugh and respond, "what gave it away, the stomach or the colors?". Her response will go down as my favorite so far, "girl, you poochin' ". Both me and the woman behind me burst into laughter. The other girl quickly let me know that she was only laughing because she is due in May. It turns out the same time as me. We all break into conversation about babies, doctors, etc.

I'm glad my belly can strike up a fun conversation among strangers. Let's just hope it quits soon after the little one is born.

Barefoot, pregnant, and where I belong

Although I am very well into trimester #2, it wasn't until a few weeks ago that I started feeling significantly better. There are many things I am now jumping for joy about, but the best thing is that I love food again. For the first 15 weeks or so I would be in tears any time I had to go to the grocery store. My method was to speed through the frozen food section, focus straight ahead as to not see too much, and grab whatever seemed to have the least amount of prep time. Poor Bryan seemed to be having "sympathy" heartburn, but we know the real reason for that.

I am so happy to now be back in the kitchen and eating real food rather than crackers, cottage cheese and buffalo sauce (you think I'm kidding, but it was hard to find wings in CA, and a pregant woman must have what she craves). I'm even attempting to update my recipes blog so check it out if you want at angiehdavisrecipes.blogspot.com. Todays post is Guiltless Blues Burgers, baked sweet potato fries and a pear, blue cheese and walnut salad. If you ever try anything, I would sincerely love your critique!

It's a.....

BOY!!

Bryan and I had such a fun Christmas being able to tell everyone that our little one is a boy. We were also very surprised when Bryan's younger sister announced that she was pregnant too! Their baby will be due in August, just 3 months after ours.

No turning back

As I wrote a few weeks ago, for me the confirmation of pregnancy was feeling the baby kick. I guess it took Bryan a little longer. I am assuming the light bulb came on last night as he said, "wow, you are really getting big. I guess you really are pregnant"!

I'm sure I'll be right there with you soon Katie. :)

Only 3 more days until we find out if the little booger is a boy or girl!