one year

it's really hard to believe that it was only a year ago that we were walking the streets of NYC, trying to catch a glimpse of the rockefellar christmas tree, when i got the first 'hunch' that we were going to get to meet you that very weekend. i remember driving through the snow to greenwhich CT ~ shaking from shock, excitement, and nerves ~ you weren't due until january! though i was peaceful that you were going to be fine. months of heartfelt prayers were being answered so graciously. how could i not trust that the lord was smiling with us, bringing you into this world in perfect time? a month early, and you were still 2 oz. bigger than your bigger brother!

remember that. maybe you could use it for leverage in the future.

it's been a tough year. horrible reflux, living in an apartment above a restaurant in the dead of winter in NY, no family near...... not to mention that you woke at night every 1-3 hours for the first 5 months, not much better for the next 3, every 3 to 4 hours by 8 months (on good nights), and finally only woke once in the night at 10 months. for 2 weeks.

finally, at one year, we are seeing glimpses of a sleeper. though we are still crossing our fingers and holding our breath each night.

but there is no question that i would do it all again. to say you are a joy to our family is an understatement. sleeping may not be your strong suit, but smiling is.

you love to talk. you've made me laugh several times as i've tried to teach you sign language for a word and you look at me like i'm crazy and proceed to say the word instead. "all done" for instance. i was saying it over and over, throwing my hands in the air and acting a fool when you looked at me with your classic sam smirk and said "ah-da".

you think it is hilarious to stand on your own, but you've yet to take a step.

you're a mama's boy.

just between us, let's always keep it that way. k?

sam, i hope not a day goes by that you don't know how much you are loved ~ by me, by your dad and brother, but mostly by the One who brought you into our world!

happy birthday, my sweet baby sam. i hope you will forgive your sappy, sentimental mom over the years. she just can't help herself.